Post-Berkshire Gratitude

Grateful for so much over this last T-day weekend.
1) Dancing to the drums with the amazing Toni Bergins and KDZ. Man, if I could do that every day—or even once a week, I’d be a happy, flexi, sexy old woman some day
2) Breathing in the Berkshire air
3) The swirl of lovely, open, messy, alive, connected talking. My heart feels about 10,000 times calmer and opener and settleder, if still a bit sad.
4) Supported catharsis and the love that came from nowhere and everywhere when I needed it most
5) The gorgeous heart rocks from Heartman—and hiking up the frosty road to find them
6) That the Berkshires DO seem dreamlike on account of that frostin’
7) Getting up-dog help in class from N today at Kula. Everything in my life on every level seems to come down to one thing—figuring out how to open my heart. I keep wondering if someday the work on the physical and emotional stuff will dovetail and I’ll just be able to backbend and truly love all at once.
8) That S accepted my apology. And realizing what a blessing it is when someone truly appreciates and accepts an apology. I mean it’s an ego burn when you realize that you actually did hurt someone or screw up when they don’t say, “What? Oh, I didn’t even notice.” But when they can actually take it in and let your sorrow touch the pain you inadvertently caused (even if it’s not a huge deal), it’s kind of a moment of grace. For both people.
9) This fantastic illustrator’s site I found by googling “Santa Yogi” (don’t ask): dancingelephantstudio.com. And her other site: Chaipilgrimage.com. (her Ganesha is above)
10) My shiny dark purple pedicure
11) Getting a ride home with R and her amazing homemade raw chocolate medicine
12) Identifying the abandon-panic that riles in my solar plexus every time I sense a potential moment of rejection. It’s hardcore stuff in there. But somehow in being able to watch instead of sob, feel instead of vent, name instead of shop or watch Gilmore Girls or eat yogurt, it evolves me. I think. I hope.
13) Talking to A for a bit and remembering there are an abundance of friends I haven’t met yet sort of thing out there in the world, doing their thang
14) The Jungle Brothers
15) K & E’s new baby girl! Born this morning. Little and earlyish and new and wet. Welcome, Miss Lila.